It's funny how much I can hate the person I love most. As I became so selfish. I do not realize that when I give all my love, I do expect the same in return, but in an even larger amount. I'm not ready to love in good times or bad, I'm able to love only in the best position of all. I can not stand the routine, I can not commonplace, but need to be loved, my behavior becomes increasingly repetitive and predictable. I have become quite pathetic. While I am grateful to be loved so intensely as ever you like, well, my wish is my greatest sorrow. At the same time my greatest affliction is not desired. I have a fear of being with her, but not to be. I am very sorry about not being able to give everything she wants, but it sounds selfish, but it saddens me not being able to give myself what I want. I do not feel able to give to not have it all, and it all means have her. On the other hand involves not have her have me. I find it difficult to even define if for me to have it all, implies to me me.
29/sep/2009
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